Hi folks,
Part two today of my introduction to Jordan Peterson’s 12 Rules For Life.
The rules I’m trying to follow (with varying degrees of success)...
Rule #2 – treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping
Any loyal reader (thanks for reading, by the way) who has read more than eleven syllables from my posts about running (really, thanks) will instantly recognize how this rule is a direct affront to my self-destructive streak. I’m also not very good at scheduling preventative health care appointments on their recommended frequency. However, my healthy eating habits – among many other routines – suggest I have the required mentality to treat myself like someone I’m helping.
Rule #3 – make friends with people who want the best for you
I probably could have moved this into the ‘already following’ category without controversy (which of my friends would argue?) but I acknowledge that I’ve never picked out my friends based on this criteria (or cut people out of my life for the reverse). I simply seem to have made friends based on other qualities (which I did not bother to figure out for today’s post).
How can you tell if someone wants the best for you? It's a hard quality to pick out when you meet someone new but I’m improving at it. For now, I’ll look for some evidence of generosity and go from there.
Rule #5 – do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them
In hindsight, I think this is the single most powerful rule in the book. I don’t have any children so I've thought about how this rule applies in other contexts. To keep it really simple, you probably should’t let anyone you like do something that makes you dislike or resent them.
I have a spotty track record with my generalization (mostly due to biting my tongue when I hear or see a friend say or do something I know I’ll resent in the future) but as with the other rules I do feel like I’m making some progress. My experience with my most recent job suggests that merely trying to stop someone from such an action is enough to change how you feel about that person. Although I don’t recommend Calling Everything Out as the recipe for success in corporate America (at least in the context of climbing the specific ladder you might be on) I did find that telling my first two managers that I thought they were liars has kept me free of resentment towards them as people. In other words, even though they followed through and did the very thing that would otherwise make me resentful, simply trying to stop them changed my view towards them. I suppose the lesson here is that it’s hard to resent people who are simply trying to overcome their own incompetence.
Rule #6 – set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
This one might be the toughest rule on the list (see comments above re: Rule #5). I’ve settled for now with merely learning to accept and live with my contradictions. I also don’t tell others to clean their bathrooms, but that’s another matter entirely. Mind your own shit.
Rule #9 – assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don’t
The phrasing of this rule is a challenge because I try not to make assumptions. However, if I play with the words a little bit, I can reformat Rule #9 – don’t assume you know everything. Sometimes I think back to recent conversations and realize that I’ve nodded along when I should have asked a follow-up question. In these reflections, I often realize that I didn’t ask because I thought I knew the answer.
Rule #12 – pet a cat when you encounter one on the street
This isn’t from a lack of trying – there just aren't that many cats wandering about on my streets.
