A good start for any leader is to tailor the communication style to the individual. There is no way to know the best approach without getting to know the individual so leaders must remember to always make time to check in with others on a personal level before moving on to the task at hand. Over time, these small moments of shared emotions and experiences will build the working relationship and help leaders understand the best way to relate to others.
Of course, even the strongest working relationship will face challenges. It’s vital to remember in these moments that any conversation has at least two versions of the truth. The goal of the tailored approach is to work within this inevitable contradiction by remaining open to a flexible perspective. Using ‘I’ at the start of any opinion and making sure not to bury the most important aspect of a perspective with too many references to other ideas more easily enables this approach.
An open exchange should always see both parties consistently asking themselves and each other how they can help their counterpart achieve certain goals or objectives. This is the basic essence of regular two-way feedback. However, feedback should never be taken for granted and a good leader remembers to ask directly whenever feedback is especially important. A good sign that the relationship is faltering is a realization that someone kept a thought or comment to themselves. In these moments, a leader must resist the temptation to point fingers and instead look in the mirror because it’s obvious in such a situation that self-perception does not match reality in terms of an openness to receiving feedback. Leaders who can grow in the aftermath of this recognition will focus on rebuilding relationships, embrace the challenge of working within contradicting versions of reality, and directly ask for feedback about the most important things.
