On one hospice volunteer shift, I was asked by an aide to sit with an agitated resident. This resident was having a very hard time falling asleep. Apparently, she had slept very little the night before and had spent the entire day tossing and turning in bed, trying in vain to rest.
This was possibly an assignment I was qualified for. I used to have a colleague who joked that I exuded melatonin. It usually happened when I sat next to her at her desk or she sat next to me at mine. After a few minutes, she would start yawning, and then the accusations about my sleep-inducing powers would start. I was never entirely sure about the science behind her conclusions but I did have to at least concede that the results consistently supported her theory.
When I walked into the resident’s room, it was just past four o’clock. I went around the bed and sat in a chair next to the window.
Hi. I’m Tim. I’m going to sit here for a little while. I hope that’s OK with you.
My entrance received no acknowledgment. The resident lay perfectly still. I sat and waited. After ten minutes, she broke her stillness and turned over with a sigh. She did this a couple more times. We remained in the shared silence. The room was slowly getting darker but night was over an hour away. I adjusted the blinds to little effect. She turned over again, sighed again. Her eyes were like glass.
Finally, she sat up and looked at me.
Do you know any way I can get to sleep?
I sat there and thought about it. The previous night, I’d lain awake for a couple of hours before giving up, turning on the light, and reading a book. When I finally nodded off, it was probably around three in the morning.
No. I’m sorry.
The resident, surely, was not very impressed by my answer. But her expression gave nothing away about how she felt. After a short time, she returned to lying down. Five minutes passed, then ten. She was very still. After twenty minutes, she had not moved.
I wasn’t sure if she was asleep or if my answer had annoyed her. I got up slowly, crept to the foot of the bed, and sat in the recliner. She remained motionless. I kept the footrest down and leaned back into the chair. I didn't have anything to read. We waited for sleep to come.
