where does art come from?

Good afternoon,

Another tardy post! Who could ever have guessed...

Today's post is it for this week. I'll be back on Monday with more of my usual blend of nonsense, insight, and filibustering.

Until then...

Tim

******************

Back in the summer, I read in one of John O'Donohue's books that it is so strange how one minute we do not exist and, in the next minute, we are here.

What is stranger still is how rarely this is discussed. Where do we come from?

No one truly knows. But people discuss what they could not reasonably know the truth about all the time- the supernatural,  what it is like to be a bird, why the Patriots always win, and so on. So, there is no special reason why this topic about our origins comes up so infrequently.

In a sense I think the same question applies to art. Where does art come from? It seems like one minute there is a block of stone or an orrdinary wall, the next minute there is a sculpture or mural.

To me, a full answer to the question would consider how the work of art lives in the artist until it is brought to life in a completed work. It could not have existed in any other person because no other person processes life experiences the way the person who lives through them does.

It is a burden of sorts for the artist. Failure to bring forth what is uniquely their own deprives the world of something that could exist through no other. If the artist does not bring forth what exists only in them, no other artist will come along to do it for them.

To take responsibility for bringing a work into the world involves using their experiences and technical skills to process their lives and find the meaning in it. As the chaos of life's unique experiences are put into order, an artist starts to see ways to bring the truth that resides within them into the world. The journey culminates with the arrival of a work of art.

Creativity brought forth in ways conflicting with those ideas is explored in Ryonusuke Akutagawa's 'Hell Screen', one of two stories I mentioned a couple of weeks ago in my August reading review.

The story is about a painter who is regarded as the best in the land. He excels in particular at vividly depicting those scenes he has witnessed with his own eyes. This strength becomes a problem when he is tasked with painting 'the hell screen', a series of panels depicting various forms of suffering, because (of course) being a mere mortal, he has never witnessed hell for himself.

He solves his own problem by initially harming and then outright torturing those in his power. He closely witnesses their reactions and captures their suffering for his work. He makes excellent progress working through the various panels in this way.

As he reaches the final panel, however, the painter finds himself in a position where he must manufacture one final scene to complete his work. The climax of the story is how the problem of the painting the final panel is resolved. (1)

Again, the story looks a little bit at my half-formed idea above- the creative process for artists involves closely witnessing the events of their own lives. As experience is processed and order imposed on the remaining confusion, the pieces which may come together in the next project start to emerge.

Of course, the flip side to that is, sometimes, all that works leads nowhere. To plunge fully into a project is no guarantee that it leads somewhere productive.

I think it is these creative cul-de-sacs that Akutagawa is writing about in 'Hell Screen'. His protagonist finds himself at a contradiction of sorts because he takes on a project with a defined end product yet does not know how to paint a scene to which he was not an eyewitness. He manipulates his experience as needed to overcome this obstacle but this approach does have obvious limitations.

I suspect all artists confront such a crossroads at some point on their journey. It calls to question how an artist balances their life and their art. What happens when one's own life experience is inadequate as a source of creative material? (2)

The path taken by the protagonist explores the results of manipulating one's life to fuel one's art. His doing so is fully understandable. Such a path allows the painter to take full advantage of his skill with the brush. It only requires that he tailor his life experiences to bring the best scenes for him to witness.

His commitment to this path means that, no matter what, he will not let his life prevent him from producing his best art. He slowly loses the balance of life and art for his life is increasing a fraudulent experience serving only to inspire his art. As his commitment to his art takes him further and further out of balance with his life, he causes those around him to suffer.

I read recently that 'you have to show up for your own life'. This was the second time, I believe, I had read that idea, but it made much more sense this time around. Stories like 'Hell Screen' bring further clarity to the concept.

A life fully witnessed, processed, and owned by the individual is critical to creating. The art that results might not be in demand. The work might not seem like much at all, even to the artist. But because it could not be created by another, it does at least belong fully to its creator.

There is something fraudulent about art that leans so heavily on technical expertise, on 'know-how'. Too much of this leads to artificial results in the sense that the work is intentionally created. It is based on life experiences that are deliberately constructed. This kind of art will eventually lack an important ingredient- the artist.

'You have to show up for your own life.' It makes more sense to me every day. It makes more and more sense as I learn about all the unique ways artists approach the creative process. What you can create and what you can produce are two very different things.

The only way to find what is truly your own is to show up, every day, and pay close attention. To an outsider, what such a process creates might seem mysterious beyond comprehension. It brings forth the big questions- where does art come? How did it get there? Where was it before?

Those are the big questions that do not get discussed all that often. I suppose one reason artists don't bother is because they work through those questions each time they get back to work. Like any exploration, their discoveries are merely unearthing what has been there all along.

Where does art come from? The answer is probably different for everybody. But the journey that brings it forth involves the same work- witnessing, processing, accepting that your own experiences are valuable and worth the effort of comprehension.

The process may bring art or it may not. It doesn't matter. The key is to remember, no matter what, to keep showing up, to not to let results shake the value you place on your own experience, and to remember that what you look for is always found in the last place you look.

Footnotes / imagined complaints

1. Spoiler alert, sort of...

I suppose if you are not interested in reading the full story, you can look up the rest of the plot yourself.  It is on Wikipedia. The entry is best accessed by Google searching 'hell screen wikipedia'. It is amazing what people bother to put online...

It is initially confusing how simple it is to search Wikipedia through Google. But it makes more sense when you consider that Google's entire purpose is to search the internet and find what you are looking for.

2. Spoiler alert, definitely...

Click here for the link to that Wikipedia summary I reference in the earlier footnote.

In this summary, there is a quote from Makoto Ueda (who is someone, I suppose, well positioned to comment on such things as short stories from one hundred years ago). His quote takes a slightly different (and probably more insightful, and definitely more succinct, and certainly more conclusive) look at the story than I did:

"For Akutagawa, the dilemma was insoluble: if the artist chooses to place his art ahead of his life, in the end he must suffer the destruction of his life."

The mental hurdle that I suspect many struggle with is something resembling the inverse of that- will placing one's life ahead of one's art lead inevitably to the destruction of one's art?

I don't think that needs to be the case. I could see it being true, though, especially for those who impose expectations on what 'their art' is supposed to be. A photographer whose idea of art involves only capturing the wilderness, for example, is going to see the potential for creating that art stifled and ultimately suffocated by a lifelong commitment to urban living.

There is a concept here that comes to mind (again from the same source where I drew the idea that you must show up for your own life)- a love based on conditions is a diseased love. At some point, the conditions will become impossible to meet and the love incapable of lasting.

I think creativity might work along those same lines. To impose conditions on creativity poisons it. Ultimately, these conditions limit the ability to create.

i read 'the life-changing magic of tidying up' so you don't have to

Hi folks,

Longtime readers will recall how I use specific criteria to determine my next read. However, every once in a while I do end up reading a book that does not fully meet any of those criteria. I suppose good rules are defined by their exceptions...

Marie Kondo's The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, a book I finished in the middle of September, is the most recent example of such a book. Despite not meeting any of my usual criteria, I felt a strange kind of pressure to read it. Eventually, I gave in and picked up a copy (1).

I thought this book was very good. Without question, it was effective- as soon as I finished reading the final sentence, I immediately felt compelled to BEGIN TIDYING.

But what to tidy? It took me a couple of days to realize that the book itself was the ideal place to start. I tend to already do this, anyway, through my note taking process, so it was not a very difficult idea to try out. I was also emboldened by the unofficial blessing of the author herself- Kondo suggests that those who own books bearing only information consider tearing out the relevant pages and tossing aside the rest.

I ended up 'tidying' the book in two ways.

First, I tried to state what the underlying principle was for her tidying method. Second, I applied that principle to 'tidy' the book.

I. The main principle of tidying

Kondo's main principle for tidying is a simple two-step process:

1) Discard everything you do not need
2) Decide where everything that remains should be stored

II. The life-changing magic of tidying up applied to The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up

Let's restate the principles in the context of the project:

1) Discard every unnecessary syllable
2) Rearrange the remaining into a (relatively) coherent piece of writing

Here is the result- a 213 page book in 99 words:

"One reason so many of us never succeed at tidying is because we have too much stuff...If you consider the rent or mortgage you pay, turning your space into a storage shed...costs you...discarding must come first...look at each item...and decide whether or not to keep it and where to put it...If it (sparks joy), keep it. If not, dispose of it...Clutter is caused by a failure to return things to where they belong. Therefore, storage should reduce the effort needed to put things away, not the effort needed to get them out"

At some point, everyone is exposed to the problem of accumulation. It might not necessarily involve the place where you live. It could be your work space, your email inbox, your blog posts, or your wallet that needs tidying. Because such a problem seems so inevitable, I think it is very valuable to at least understand the main principle from this book

On the other hand, one danger of summarizing is the possibility of obscuring a complex idea. In the case of my summary for this book, I know the strong call to action is lost (again, when I finished reading I immediately sought to BEGIN TIDYING). And my guess is that any reader of my summary will not feel compelled to take up tidying for themselves.

In other words, the power of this book to motivate is obscured by the summary's focus on the know-how of tidying. The summary assumes you cannot tidy because you do not know how. It fails to address the case of someone who cannot tidy because they do not feel like it.

As Kondo points out time and again, for many clutter is a symptom of a deeper lying problem with motivation. Once properly motivated, people are generally able to complete the act of tidying (though perhaps not as skillfully as Kondo). If you are intrigued by the possibility of reading this book AND currently find it difficult to motivate yourself to start the daunting task of tidying, I would very much label this required reading.

For the rest of us, perhaps simply applying the principle above will suffice for now.

Thanks as always for reading. Please check in again on Wednesday for my next post.

Tim

Footnotes / imagined complaints


1. There must be a reason you read it, though...

I came up with a few reasons for why I did eventually read it. None of these stand on its own but, as a group, provided enough justification for me to pick it up back in August.

a) It came up ALL THE TIME

When I say this, I include the two blogs I read for book recommendations (neither gave it a sterling review) and an unusually high number of friends, family, and acquaintances who read it or asked if I read it. I suppose it seemed like the type of book I would read, I guess (and since I did, I guess everyone was right.)

b) What does the title mean?

I was curious about two elements in the title. First, I do not know anyone who I would describe as tidy. There always seems to be some element of untidiness to everyone. So, I thought it might be interesting to hear what an expert would consider 'tidy'. Apparently, it just means someone who only has what they need.

Second, I wanted to know if the word 'Japanese' in the subtitle was necessary. The short answer- no. There is nothing Japanese about this method. 

c) Books like this tend to be underrated

If this book clocked in at 4.2 or higher on Goodreads, I probably would have read it earlier. It came in at 3.8 and therefore I initially skipped it.

It took me a couple of months to realize that most books written by people who are focused on one thing all the time (anyone reflecting on a time-consuming career like being a doctor or athlete, books by parents about parenting, memoirs about travel/illness/creativity/addicition, etc) tend to be really good if you, as a reader, are interested in the subject matter. Once I made this realization, I lowered my rating threshold accordingly.

hitting the pods button...

Clickbait headline

Tim stops listening!

Google search keywords

podcasts listening july iPod broken replace cheapskate

This post in one sentence...

No more podcasts for the monthly Proper Admin post.

Haiku version

The sound of my life
I always play it by ear
Pods on holiday

@TrueOnAverage

Today's semi-pointless TOA post describes not replacing the iPod I broke in early July. #TOA

Questions only

Who: Public Tim
What: Stopped listening to podcasts
When: Early July
How: Failure to replace broken iPod
Where: His ears...?
Why: Wanted to see how long he could 'get by without an iPod'

Is that Ron Howard?

And now the story of a well-off blogger who lost a couple of things and decided to write about it a little bit while he pondered his choice to eschew a replacement altogether...

It's True on Average.

Voicemail

'Hi, you've reached Tim. I can't come (...mumbling...) right now because my iPod just broke and I am trying to decide what to do. Please leave (...static...) if you have any advice. Thanks.'

Same questions with The Real Reasons

Who: Private Tim
What: Wants to spend more time in thought
When: Whenever there is time
How: Lessen outside distractions
Where: His head...?
Why: Outside noise can block out our own thinking

Third grader's 'book' report

This post was about podcasts. The author is a guy named Tim.

It was about when he broke his iPod because he used it too much. Tim likes podcasts but he likes trying things to. He did not buy a new podcast. This is because he is called a dinosaur because he uses old things. He liked hearing things like ducks quacking and tourists talking. Now he thinks more and sometimes strangers talk to him to ask four money.

I like this story. My friend did not like it because there were no pictures of dinosaurs. It showed that listening is good.

Is that Alex Trebek?

Okay, the final category is 'Blogs That No One Reads'...

Answer:

'This blog discussed the unexpected result of a one-week experiment that commenced immediately after the author broke a cherished digital music player. You have thirty seconds. Good luck.'

A long, long time ago on a blog far, far away...

Episode (LVIII)- A New Hope...

It is an uncertain period. After years of sound control

by the APPLE CORPORATION, a clumsy sequence

of events has led to the destruction of the I-POD.

Freed from the din of football nonsense, startling

economics facts, and runaway rants about the state

of the electorate, a group of scattered but free

thinking ideas has pushed the incessant noise

aside to take tenuous control of the RIGHT HEMISPHERE.

Little do these brave concepts know of ongoing

debates for the purchase of a replacement music

device, loosely referred to as THE DEAF STAR.

As the summer heat lifts temperatures to levels

rarely seen even on planets with 

TWO SUNS, an uneasy equilibrium 

bears the tension between past and future...

Is that Jim Nantz?

'OK folks, it has come down to this. We've watched the battery dwindling all afternoon but it looks like Tim is going to get to the library before his iPod goes dead. He's currently circling the bike rack folks...the din is incredible...he's all racked up now...it looks like he is going to turn off the iPod before entering the library but, folks, he's had trouble with executing that play all afternoon...

There he goes...he reaches...nearly there...he got it! Wait, no! It seemed like he got it from this angle but the podcast continues to rattle on! What is going on here? Well, this is going to be controversial, no doubt about it, from the replay you can clearly see he is pushing the 'pause' button but there is no response on the device. It's a shame, it looks like the iPod just gave out there. You hate to see that, right at the end too. I'm not sure what this will mean for the future but we will have to keep an eye on it before his next ride out. Oh, what a tough break indeed.'

Timeline

August 23, 2006: Tim buys his first laptop computer and opens an application called 'iTunes'.

Fall of 2006: Tim begins a mail delivery campus job. He quickly learns there is no requirement to speak or listen.

Fall of 2007: Tim becomes aware of a 'thing' called podcasts. He listens to his first episode of The B.S. Report.

June/July of 2008: A six week summer trip to Japan. Tim leaves his headphones in America and finds a very deep sense of calm among the mountains, nature, and quiet of Iida, a small city of stunning beauty in Nagano Prefecture.

August 2008: Tim immediately plugs in his headphones upon return from Japan, apparently barred from bringing his lessons through customs at Narita International Airport.

Fall 2008 - Winter 2010: Tim expands his set of podcast subscriptions to include popular shows such as Radiolab.

Spring 2010: A brief senior year experiment where Tim leaves his headphones in his dorm room. It last about two weeks.

Summer 2010: Tim's first period of unemployment includes 45 minute walks across town in the wee hours of the morning listening to podcasts such as ESPN's Fantasy Focus.

Late 2010: Tim's first iPod breaks- the headphone jack no longer transmits audio to the left earbud. A compromise solution is discovered one day when the headphone comes halfway out of the jack- in this position, the right earbud stream is successfully sent to both earbuds. The iPod remains in use for two more years.

2011-2014: A series of podcasts comes as goes. Backstory, 99% Invisible, Planet Money, Freakonomics Radio, Philosophy Bites, and Football Weekly are a few of the many shows that Tim tries and fails to stick with.

Date unknown: Tim drops Radiolab, cryptically announcing that it is 'a podcast for people who don't listen to podcasts'. It is rumored that the tip of his nose is pointed straight into the sky as he delivers this pompous assessment.

2015: Tim listens to 'The Living Room' from Love and Radio, the single most memorable podcast episode he has ever heard.

February 2016: A second period of unemployment begins. The podcast lineup, set for over a year, begins to again undergo changes. Shows such as TLDR, Startup, Open For Business, and Revisionist History With Malcolm Gladwell come and go.

Spring 2016: Tim downloads the backlog of The Football Ramble- about one episode per week for the five year stretch from 2011 to 2015.

July 2016: Tim's iPod breaks after constant usage during running, walking, and biking. The timing is bad to purchase a replacement and recent trends in tech work against him- the worst version of iPod available is no longer compatible with his computer. Having endured recent unsatisfactory experiences with used iPods, Tim decides to wait a week before buying a replacement.

August 2016: A week is now one month. Failure to acquire a set of cheap speakers is taking its toll on the laptop- the sound quality has deteriorated greatly in just a month of at-home use. But carrying the headphones around outdoors is not missed.

September 2016: Tim gives up on writing a proper post about his podcast situation after a number of aborted efforts. Carrying around headphones outside remains a fact of the past.

Is that Bono?

This wouldn't be a problem if Apple just downloaded podcasts straight into your brain without asking.

Proper Admin Podcasts- July/August

Longtime readers will recall that I used to include a monthly podcast summary as part of my 'Proper Admin' series. The last such installment was for the month of June. Dedicated readers may also recall a post about a specific episode from the More Or Less podcast that delved into Simpson's Paradox. That post was sometime in May, I suspect.

In any event, it has been quite some time since I've worked podcasts into a blog. So, what gives?

Well, I suppose it is good news or bad news depending on your point of view- it has been about two months since I last listened to a podcast. This means I have nothing to write about podcasts since I have no source material to work with. I'm sure you get the idea.

I have no idea how permanent this development is. I did a similar thing in my senior spring of college- I left my headphones in my room (except for going to the gym). That last about two weeks. So it is possible that I might return to my binge listening habits sometime in the near future.

On the other hand, I've dropped interests without much warning at other times in my past- watching TV shows, watching movies, playing video games, watching live sports. So maybe this is a case of podcasts becoming the next in a long line of Entertainments I Used To Enjoy. It is hard to tell at this stage.

The catalyst for the change came in the first week of July. I noticed one day that I could not stop my iPod. Just kept hitting the old pause button to no avail. As I studied it more closely, I realized the entire screen no longer showed anything. Since the screen has only one function- to show things- this was not good.

I unofficially declared the iPod 'cooked' a few days later. A number of things came together to prevent me from immediately acquiring a replacement. So, I decided to make do for a few days without one. Interestingly, I didn't miss it all that much.

So I decided to try a few more days. Then, weeks. And now two months later, here we are.

It took me an extra couple of weeks to prepare this post. This is primarily because I have no idea what it all means. The change from walking about with headphones in at almost all times to never having them in is not necessarily significant. It will probably improve my hearing, I've heard. But the fact that I barely missed it seems relevant.

The argument for eventually returning to podcasts is fairly straightforward. Podcasts are fun. They provide an alternate way to learn new things, hear interesting conversations, or just have a laugh. Since they are a passive form of entertainment, I have to give up barely anything to listen to them.

The argument against returning is fairly straightforward. Not everything I do is fun. It is much better to try new things, have interesting conversations, or think up your comedy than it is to passively absorb it through your ears. I have to give up time that I could otherwise spend thinking to listen to them.

The good thing about pointless problems is that they do not really need to be solved. So, for now, I am in a holding pattern of listening to The Football Ramble at home and keeping track of everything else that I am skipping. If I return, I'll have a backlog but that is no big deal.

Until Friday...

Tim

Proper Admin Podcasts- July/August: The Prequel

Hi everyone,

I thought today I would provide some backstory for the most recent 'Proper Admin' podcast post.

Thanks for reading. See you all again on Friday.

Tim

Just over ten years ago, I walked out of a sad little mall on the South Shore with my first ever personal computer. I believe it was called a MacBook. In fact, whatever the name of it was, it still is, for I still have it (and even use it about once per day). Ten long years! But that is a post for another day (and perhaps another blog).

The Apple store had a 'special' deal at that time- buy one extremely expensive laptop computer and you would receive an iPod for free. As I recall, the iPod was unnecessarily large- perhaps to convince skeptics and the technology-illiterate that it contained 'more memory' than the smaller 'regular' offering.

So, to be entirely accurate, just over ten years ago I walked out of a sad little mall on the South Shore with my first ever personal computer AND an enormous black free ('FREE') iPod. I soon discovered that iTunes allowed users to download these things called 'podcasts' directly onto their iPod by linking it to their iTunes application. And so began my love affair with podcasts.

I remember my first podcast. It was Bill Simmons's now-defunct (but essentially relaunched) B.S. Report from ESPN. I used to listen to episodes of this show while I completed my college work-study assignments (mail delivery- I was a mailman!). The job was basically a microcosm of college itself- walking semi-aimlessly from building to building with a variety of items- and the lack of interaction with others made it ideal for plugging in the headphones.

Unfortunately, I was promoted into a desk job during my sophomore year. One of the key responsibilities for the position was 'to speak and listen to others'. I managed to overcome this hurdle by listening to podcast episodes in five and ten minute bursts as I marched around campus going to class, the gym, and the cafeteria.

The ensuing years saw a number of podcasts added and ultimately removed from the regular listening rotation. Freakonomics Radio, Radiolab, Planet Money, Football Weekly, Philosophy Bites, 99% Invisible, the list would go on and on. My guess is that if you think I have heard of the show, I've subscribed to it at some point.

Until about the end of June this year, my pattern of keeping up with a core group of five to eight shows while rotating others in held up. Currently, I have eleven shows I regularly download.

And then, as I described in a separate post, my iPod broke and I decided to try something different. So now we are in this holding pattern...

Proper Admin Podcasts- July/August: The Sequel- Version One

Hey folks,

A few weeks ago, I wrote about the unexpected results from not immediately replacing a broken iPod. I'll cut right to the chase- I still haven't replaced it. I think it is safe to say that this is one of those 'temporary' permanent things.

Having my ears free has been a minor blessing. Just last week, I was wandering over by the Public Garden when I heard a loud QUACK. I looked down, foot frozen in midair, at the confused/happy/thoughtful/hateful/grateful/I-can't-tell-what-a-duck's-face-is duck I was about to step on.

On the other hand, I could have used that opportunity to make a hilarious reference to Caddyshack- so maybe that was not so good.

From the point of view of blogging, I'm not all that fussed over this development. I never started here intending to write about podcasts. My guess is that most readers used react to my monthly section about podcasts with some thought like 'This guy has no clue what he wants to listen to'. I think that made-up reaction is somewhat representative of my thoughts on podcast writing.

Ultimately, podcasts are not a great fit with my learning style. Rarely do they move me at an emotional level. And although they are fun to talk about, there are other things that I could follow if I really needed to do that.

I think podcasts are a viable source for fresh ideas. The reality of certain lifestyles is that burying your nose in a book is not always a realistic option. I'm fortunate enough to have that option. I think everything I learn from a given podcast is just as accessible if I found a book with a similar concept.

The thought I keep going back to comes from a day at work about three years ago. My boss at the time held a writing contest based on a reaction to a TED Talk. I did not bother listening to the talk- I found a transcript online and read it. I got just as much information out of it as everyone who listened. But reading it took about four minutes while the entire recording was around twenty minutes.

This is in line with some basic research findings about how quickly we process written versus spoken communication- it is about five to one in favor of the reader. I'm not necessarily crunched for time these days but I would hate to turn that efficiency down.

I'm also reminded of a common frustration I have with phone calls. Why bother to call when the written content is far more important than the emotional content? Better to type out a quick text than pick up the phone and use up my time talking, I think, in these cases.

Finally, I just have to admit- I'm enjoying the quiet. I find that getting rid of the noise in my head is allowing me to think more clearly and at greater complexity than I ever have before. Who knows? I might even have a good idea one of these days.

If I do, I promise to blog about it.

Until that happy day...

As a reminder, next week is the start of my new 'bi-monthly' schedule. That means I'll either post two months from now or two weeks from now. Get it? I told you I would have a good idea.

Thanks for reading, as always. See you on Friday.

Tim

Proper Admin Podcasts- July/August: The Sequel- Version Two

Hey folks,

A few weeks ago, I wrote about the unexpected results from not immediately replacing a broken iPod. I'll cut right to the chase- I replaced it. I think it is safe to say that this is one of those things that lasted just long enough to seem permanent but not quite long enough for it to be irreversible.

Having my ears fully loaded has been a minor blessing. Just last week, I was wandering over by the Public Garden when I heard a very faint QUACK. I looked down, foot firmly stopped in what appeared to be midair, before I noticed the confused/happy/thoughtful/hateful/grateful/I-can't-tell-what-a-duck's-face-is duck I had just stepped on. I took this opportunity to make a hilarious reference to Caddyshack (the duck was fine, everyone).

On the other hand, I could have used that opportunity to actually stop my foot in mid-air to publicly demonstrate my concern for little animals- so maybe that was not so good.

From the point of view of blogging, I'm not all that fussed over this development. I never started here intending to write about podcasts. My guess is that most readers used react to my monthly section about podcasts with some thought like 'This guy has no clue what he wants to listen to'. I think that made-up reaction is somewhat representative of my thoughts on podcast writing.

Ultimately, podcasts are a great fit with my learning style. Occasionally, they move me at an emotional level. And they are fun to talk about!

I think podcasts are a viable source for fresh ideas. The reality of certain lifestyles is that burying your nose in a book gets old quick. Plus, I think I learn things from podcasts differently than I learn from books with a similar concept.

The thought I keep going back to comes from a day at work about three years ago. My boss at the time held a writing contest based on a reaction to a TED Talk. I did not bother listening to the talk- I found a transcript online and read it. I got just as much information out of it as everyone who listened. But the process of searching for the transcript, verifying it was the correct one, printing it out, and reading it took about twenty minutes- about the same length as the recording.

This is in line with some basic research findings about how we perceive efficiency. A colleague pointed out how 'efficient' reading was compared to listening- about five to one in terms of word comprehension. But factor in all the extra work needed to acquire the written version and the efficiency is quickly lost. Plus, I'm not necessarily crunched for time these days so I am not so worried about being 'efficient'.

I'm also reminded of a common frustration I have with texting. Why bother to text something when the emotional aspect far outweighs the written content? Better to dial up the phone number, I think, in these cases.

Finally, I just have to admit- I'm enjoying the noise. I find that getting rid of the quiet in my head is allowing me to absorb more complex ideas than I ever have before. Who knows? I might even be inspired to have my own good idea one of these days.

If I do, I promise to blog about it.

Until that happy day...

As a reminder, next week is the start of my new 'bi-monthly' schedule. That means I'll either post two months from now or two weeks from now. Get it? I told you I would be inspired.

Thanks for reading, as always. See you on Friday.

Tim

proper admin august- books

Hi all,

A quick review of my reading from August.

*Turn by Anne Truitt (8/5)

Truitt's book is the second of three journals she wrote in which she reflected on her life and career. Turn covers a lot of ground I've come to expect from these types of books- musings on inspiration, the creative process, the balance of making a living and committing to your craft. There were also some sections that went right over my head- maybe I'll understand them a decade or two from now.

I knew this was going to be a good read when I reached this idea: an artist is in the service of truth- and nothing else. The concept most applicable to this idea is an observation about how people tend to become uncomfortable when they do not know what someone is going to say.

This struck me as remarkably truthful. I think we sometimes understandably opt to steer interactions or conversations away from these uncertain places. But questions to which you already know the answer are not really questions. The ability to ask honest questions is a small but wonderful gift.

The best concept covered in this book is about balance. In one section, Truitt describes balance, not stability, as the key for security. This is because life is unpredictable and requires us to exercise our balancing capabilities time and time again. Too much stability atrophies these qualities and leaves us with less to call on in those difficult times where we struggle to restore equilibrium.

A later section of the book takes a more meditative approach. The way water fills a space mirrors how an individual must find oneself. The key is to adapt and shift structure without losing our basic nature, always seeking balance, always filling the space in full to the best of our ability, and never stranding a part of ourself in an attempt to go beyond our own limits.

I'm currently reading the first book of her 'trilogy', Daybook, and guarantee that I'll finish up Prospect, her final work, before the New Year.

*CivilWarLand In Bad Decline by George Saunders (8/12)

One of the ideas I've been kicking around my head over the past couple of months involves the way we are sometimes challenged to live with two contradicting ideas at the same time. It is a hard idea to articulate fully and I unsurprisingly had a difficult time coming up with clear examples. One personal example is how I tend to say that I do not watch TV yet do not feel like a liar every time I tune in for a live sporting event.

It is easy to jump into these situations and start wildly making accusations ('only a HYPOCRITE would DRIVE to a green energy rally!') but most situations have layers of complexity hidden beneath the apparent hypocrisy on the surface.

It kind of occurred to me that perhaps reading this book would give me a fresh angle to consider while I was mulling this idea over. The reason was this quote from Saunders:

'In art, and maybe just in general, the idea is to be able to be really comfortable with contradictory ideas. In other words, wisdom might be, seem to be, two contradictory ideas both expressed at their highest level and just let to sit in the same cage sort of, vibrating. So, I think as a writer, I'm really never sure of what I really believe.' (1)

As I read the short stories and novella in this collection, the general concept described in this quote came through time and again. A lot of the stories can lazily be described as being 'about America' (which I've just done, I guess) and the challenge of balancing the needs of the self with the needs of the group. Another way to consider the collection is to view it as a series of explorations into how the powerless try to create a semblance of control in their lives.

The end result is a very memorable work. I'm looking forward to rereading the rest of his work over the next year to see if this idea continues to underlie his writing. If I'm fortunate, I might even find it helpful in eventually clarifying my own viewpoint on the matter.

Until then, I suppose we will all just have to sit in our cages, vibrating, not sure entirely what we believe in. Might as well make myself comfortable...

*Mastery by George Leonard (8/16)

This was a terrific little book about the progression people follow as they learn new skills. I think the reader who will get the most from this book is one who has not given much thought to their own learning process yet is open to new ways of thought and unafraid of struggling without visible or immediate payoff in a quest to master a skill.

I found a number of ideas thought provoking. One was how the 'moment of triumph' is always dangerous for a group or society because the feeling of victory places us in danger of ignoring the costs incurred in pursuing the goal and reduces the sense of obligation to go back and fix those. The example given by Leonard was capitalism and the environment.

Another idea I liked is how tremendous resistance to a suggested change indicates that it is either a really good idea or a really bad idea. I'm sure this idea makes no sense if you have a definite opinion on Donald Trump, Presidential Candidate.

The last note I took down was probably the best- the most common inhibitor of adult learning is a fear of 'looking silly'.

*Seinfeldia by Jennifer Keishin Armstrong (8/24)

A book about the show about nothing. A book about nothing, then?

Turns out that a lot of the Seinfeld story lines came directly from the lives of the writers. I guess I was not expecting that but, when I read it, it made perfect sense. Who would ever think up the Soup Nazi?

One of my favorite Bill Simmons theories is that comedians tend to struggle a bit to come up with material that their audiences relate to as their connection to a normal life weakens. Perhaps Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld were wary of this possibility for their writing staff. They handled it by often jettisoning writers after one season. This was because the process of writing for the show was too all-consuming. To participate in Seinfeld likely meant writers could not live normal enough lives outside the show to accumulate the kind of new experiences needed to replenish the stock they depleted in contributing to the show's episodes.

My favorite Seinfeld episode is 'The Chinese Restaurant'. I still reference George's line 'For fifty bucks I'll put my face in the soup and blow' even though I am sure almost nobody has any idea what I'm talking about.

Click here for a somewhat low quality Youtube clip of that scene (clip is two minutes long).

*Rashomon and seventeen other stories by Ryunosuke Akutagawa (8/25)

There is a well-known movie called Rashomon that is based on two of these stories- 'Rashomon' and 'In A Grove'. The latter contributes most of the plot and characters to the film, I've heard, leaving open the question of what else remains for the former to contribute. The scenery, maybe.

If you enjoyed the film, I suppose you might enjoy reading the stories. I can't really say as I have yet to see the film. Reading the two stories is not a major commitment of time.

Two other stories made a lasting impression. In the process of preparing my comments on those for this post, I found that each linked to different ideas and themes that I have covered here or that I have come across in other reading. I'm going to cover each one separately in upcoming posts once I've managed to sort out my thoughts.

Haruki Murakami writes the introduction to the collection I read. One of the things Murakami points out is how influential Akutagawa's style was on his own. In hindsight, this did not require stating- as I read the stories, I caught myself on more than one occasion recognizing similarities in phrasing or expression with some of Murakami's writing.

*The Visual Display of Quantitative Information by Edward Tufte (8/27) (2)

This is a great book if you are interested in an analysis of how good infographics work. There is a lot of guidance within at both the concept and detail level.

If interested in a quick read, you can click here to read an analysis of what this book declares one of the best infographics ever put together. It is a graphic that covers many dimensions of Napoleon's 1812 march into and out of Russia in one place. The analysis I link to above is not written by Tufte.

The general theme of the book is fairly straightforward- good infographics 'keep their eyes on the road'. They do not divert attention away from the relevant information through the use of trivial dots, lines, or observations.

--------------------------------------------------------------

That's all I got from August. Thanks again for stopping by. See you again on Monday at the usual time.

Tim

Footnotes / imagined complaints...

1. So in what cage did I find this quote, vibrating?

I sadly cannot recall what the context of this comment was. My best guess is that it was featured in Chuck Klosterman's But What If We're Wrong, a book for which Saunders was interviewed by Klosterman.

2. A quick story about this book that highlight the 'general theme'...

I was carrying this book with me while crossing a footbridge near the Charles River when a guy walking past me turned back and announced that it was 'a great book'. He did not have the chance to add to his observation for he promptly walked straight into a guy slowly pedaling his bike the other way.

This collision prompted the book-lover to suggest that the rider walk his bike. So, uh, if you are wondering what kind of company enjoying this book puts you into- you have that guy!

proper admin- september

Hi all,

Welcome to 'proper admin', my monthly recap post for everything and anything worth sharing that did not make it into a blog.

Thanks for reading this past month.

Blog Admin- September 2016

As I detailed in yesterday's post on my Business Bro Blog, there comes a time when you have to acknowledge that there is more to do than resources available to do it. In the context of this blog, that means not getting posts up on time or not working on posts that I want to write. Both of those things happened enough in August for me to conclude that I need to adjust the schedule.

Plus, that whole 'still looking for work' thing...

So, for September, we'll go with a Monday-Friday-Wednesday rotation. (It is confusing, sort of.) That comes out to three posts every two weeks or one post every four or five days. If things go up on time and I get to work on posts I want to write, I'll consider reverting to the old schedule for October.

(But, again, like I detailed yesterday- given the frequency of 'shortages' on this blog, I should probably build up a proper inventory first.)

I am also working out the details for a similar adjustment to the Business Bro blog as these things go hand in hand. Details to come on that space next Thursday.

Q + A from August- actual questions from actual readers

Q: Your post is late again?

A: Ah, quiet down you. Like I said above...

Commentary on August 2016 blog posts (True On Average)

*8/5- Proper Admin August

I originally wrote this post in two parts. But as I worked on part two, I realized- I don't need to do this anymore. I've become better at incorporating my experiences into other posts. And I'm also better at walking away from an idea that I've written a lengthy draft about.

In general, I think structure is good to have early on. As things grow or develop, you start to do things that challenge that structure. There always comes a point where that original framework needs to at least be reconsidered.

At this point, I suspect there is a more than decent chance that I start phasing out this monthly post. The most likely approach is to cover September and October in early November. I guess we'll see in October...

*8/9- I Made Coffee The Other Day

I think it is worth restating that I've found Still Alice very helpful in my volunteer work with dementia patients.

*8/12- Van Persie Syndrome

I originally wrote this post for The Business Bro. It ended up making more sense to post it here. The lines blur sometimes, you know?

Sports analogies are very commonplace despite my insistence that most people do not really know what they are talking about when it comes to sports.

*8/16- Proper Admin August- Books

So the font changed on this one and I have no clue why. It has something to do with how I write in Gmail before copying and pasting into the Blogger template. Because Gmail is in HTML, I have to make an intermediate stop in MS Word to format the line and paragraph breaks.

I did the process out of order for this post and as a result the HTML carried the formatting over into the blog. I am STILL confused as to what happened. (Help, anyone?) Using notepad/textpad as the intermediate link seems sufficient to strip out the underlying HTML coded into the post but I am all ears if anyone cares to share their expertise.

On the other hand- I kind of liked that mistaken font. I might switch to it. Who knows? Weigh in if you care about this kind of thing. It is always funny where you get ideas from.

In unrelated news, I was turned down for a job earlier month due to a lack of 'technical skills'.

*8/19- So Yesterday I Ranted And Raved About How If You Can Read, You Can Code…

I should have added 'if you have long hair, tie it back' at the top of the Banana Bread recipe. Or maybe wear a (helmet) football helmet. My apologies to anyone whose consumption of my baked goods prompted that previous sentence!

*8/23- Lost In Translation- Postgame Show

Finally, its over.

I think.

*8/26- Fantasy Football For Dummies

I ran my fantasy football league's auction-draft for the sixteenth time last Saturday. Let's say I broke a couple of my own rules.

Again- this is a pointless, pointless pursuit, you know? But a great way to keep in touch with many from my high school days. Most pointless pursuits are, I think, just an excuse to keep in touch with old friends.

*8/31- Do All Road Lead To Regret?

No.

I think anyone who tries to be their best self, all the time, and vows to do better when they fail to reach this standard is setting themselves up nicely for a life of few regrets.

On the other hand, 'few' could mean five. Five could mean those five. So who knows, ya? Just give it all you've got, I've read.

I mentioned in this post the concept of a daily reminders list. In addition to the five I listed, I have some additional reminders that I try to read each day before I get started. I list it in full below (1).

Commentary on August 2016 blog posts (The Business Bro)

*8/2- A Warm Welcome From The Business Bro
*8/11- Environments Always Impact Behavior
*8/18- If You Can Read, You Can Code
*8/25- Environments Always Impact Behavior, Part 2

Well, no turning back now.

Click here if you must catch up.

Podcast Power Rankings

I am going to stop doing these on a monthly basis. I'm surprised to write that but the reality is that I have nothing important to say about these podcasts (I am less surprised to write that).

The problem is actually very simple- I stopped listening to podcasts. I'll post something more detailed later in this month to explain myself try and wrap it all up.

Pointless Top Ten

On the other hand- do we not love top ten lists?

While I have the podcasts on leave, I'll cook up a monthly 'pointless top ten list' to keep you all entertained. It'll be like Letterman- minus the humor, music, cool graphics, and celebrities.

I traveled quite a bit this summer. In fact, I left town more frequently this summer than I did in the last three summers combined (approximate). Last year, I believe I left the state exactly one time. So it was a nice change to get out and about a bit these past two months.

One thing you do an awful lot when you are out of town- you eat out. A lot. Almost always. Or you starve, I guess. Everyone has a different experience on their travels. Anyhow, I learned why some people feel compelled to take pictures and write blogs about their food.

Luckily for you, reader, I am not one of those folks because I have nothing interesting to say about food. I tend to be more of a quantity over quality type in the chow department- oh, and I also own zero equipment to take and post pictures.

To keep it simple, here is a top ten list of the best food I'll eat again from what I ate while out of town over the past two months. Wow, what a mouthful that last sentence was.

10. Fried Oreo (DC- DC Grill Express)

To perhaps everyone's surprise, I had never eaten a fried oreo. Until this. Oh boy. Let's say my arteries are hurting. A good kind of hurt, though.

9. Fried Scallop Roll (Falmouth, MA- Falmouth Fish Market)

There is a lot of noise out on the Cape when it comes to eating out. I would just recommend dropping into this place for a simple takeout order. If you need any more convincing consider 1) I never eat fried fish 2) I ate this twice in two days.

8. Bacon Donut (Portland, ME- The Holy Donut)

Narrowly edging the Fried Oreo for the 'pointless sweet of the summer' award. This is a donut with a honey-maple glaze dipped into bacon pieces. It comes with a map of nearby defibrillators.

7. BBQ Ribs (Hyannis, MA- Tumi)

I've eaten ribs more this summer for some unstated reason. These were the best. Tumi is a Peruvian/Italian kind of place that manages very good ratings in a high-traffic 'Cape Town' tourist zone.

6. Chesseburger Sliders (Providence- Harry's Bar and Burger)

It was a good sign when a friend independently recommend 'go to Harry's' just an hour after we finished lunch there. You could even do this as a day trip from Boston- twenty bucks round trip to Providence on the commuter rail is well worth it.

5. Ramen (New York City- Kambi Ramen House)

Ramen for me comes down to the broth since the really good stuff requires hours (overnight?) preparation. But the pork topping was really good, as well.

I might have the name of this place wrong. But it is in the East Village, near a somewhat memorable Papaya Dog.

4. Ethiopian Food (DC- Keren Restaurant)

Another guess at the name here. Ethiopian food is kind of like Indian food, I guess. I don't know much about either. All I know is I ate a lot of it and enjoyed myself very thoroughly.

Just in case you are one of those weirdos who can't split entrees- it comes out on a big plate so you have to share. Or you can just go alone, I suppose.

In Boston, a place like this would be in a specific 'Ethiopian' neighborhood. In DC, places like this were freely scattered about. I'm not sure if one city is more 'diverse' than another. But it was very noticeable how much Boston's neighborhoods have a trace of their early heritage, so to speak, while DC's diversity was more evenly distributed. It could be that Boston is like a deck of cards where everything is ordered by number and suit while DC is like that same deck thoroughly shuffled.

3. Mac & Cheese Croquettes (Providence- Ogie's Trailer Park)

Exactly what they sound like. I was positively stuffed after a wedding yet still hammered down a plate of these. So, uh, do with that information as you may.

Ogie's is a really good time. You can sit outside, or not, among small replica trailers.

2. Pizza by the slice! (New York City- Pizzeria Suprema )

A New York blogger called 'The Slice Harvester' went to every pizza place in NYC (approximately) with the goal of finding the best slice in town. Luckily for me, the one he decided was #1 happens to be located across the street from Penn Station. I now stop for a pair of slices before heading home on the Amtrak every time I am in town.

Back to the Slice Harvester- he wrote a book about his mission. I suppose I've already ruined the ending- apologies- but you can still check it out if interested.

1. Meatloaf (Greenwich, CT- location undisclosed)

My cousin Mary makes this. Generally, the best meal of the year.

Reading from August 2016

So breaking news here- separate post coming later this month.

Did I leave the apartment at all?

Sort of. Like I mentioned above, I did travel. August saw departures for New York, Cape Cod (x2), and Rhode Island. Technically, I also returned from my trip to DC in August.

The New York trip is a familiar thing. After a reliance on bus travel in my early-twenties, I have settled into a basic itinerary that accounts for my height, general disinterest in the bus, and lifelong love of trains.

When I leave Boston, I try to book a short bus ticket to New Haven. This trip is usually just over two hours and reliable due to the lack of traffic on the way. From there, I take the Metro North, the local commuter train, from New Haven to Grand Central.

I like Grand Central. If I am meeting someone there, I usually tell that person I will be fifteen minutes later than expected. That gives me time to wander around and have a look. They pointlessly added an Apple store there a few years ago, somewhat ruining the feel of it, but I solved that problem last month by finding a place to stand where I could keep my back to it.

On the way home, I always go Amtrak from Penn Station. As referenced above, there is a very good 'pizza by the slice' establishment right next door. Unlike on the first leg, going through New Haven is not a great idea. This is because the Metro North train is sometimes delayed but the ticketed bus to Boston leaves at fixed times. Since the bus runs so infrequently, missing the bus will cost you dearly. If you wish to safely arrive on time to catch the bus, you must take a much earlier train to New Haven than logic would dictate. Better to just sleep on the Amtrak after those slices!

In general, though, I did not really leave the apartment during the day unless required. It was too hot and humid in Boston.

It was interesting this summer to talk to people with regular day jobs. Often, I would hear how nice or great the weather was from someone who probably peeked out the window once or twice from their air conditioned office.

Let me break some news- there is nothing nice about a humid eighty-eight degree Boston day. I guess the perception of how nice the day is depends a lot on the form of participation.

I'm looking forward to going outside in September.

Most of the time I did spend outside in August was while biking to and from libraries. I go to the main libraries in Boston and Cambridge daily to use the public computers.

The computer situation is important to me because I use these to search and apply for work. I also use them to proofread and post blogs. Sadly, my 2006 Mac Book is no longer capable of handling the processing power required to submit resumes, edit cover letters, and access Google Drive (where I save all my files).

When I was laid off, I quickly discovered that the Cambridge Main Library had a very strong computer setup and started most of my days there. Like with Boston, the Cambridge library allows users two hours of total computer time per day. When my two hours were up, I would go to the far inferior Boston Public Library lab and struggle through my remaining 'admin' on their ancient computers in my remaining two hours.

The battle between the Boston and Cambridge computer labs heated up (or perhaps more accurately, started) this summer when Boston reopened its renovated space. This space included a new computer lab. It is a ten-fold upgrade on the previous setup. In short, these are likely the best computers I have ever used. The room is spacious, clean, and well lit. I'm here right now!

The only reason why I am not quite ready to give Boston the #1 spot in my 'public computer power rankings' is their ridiculously complex printing system. You have to send a print job to the printer, then log in at the printer, then print the document. There are no instructions available on how to do this properly so I often watch users scurry back and forth from computer to printer to computer, trying to sort out the mess. Sometimes, a library employee notices all the activity and offers to help. To top it all off, each printed page costs fifteen cents. If you have not made preparations to pay, you do this at the printer. That will take another few minutes.

The Cambridge setup is simple. Everyone gets ten free pages per day. After that, the library card is charged. There is no 'releasing of print jobs'- you just hit print. There is no separate payment method. There is no need for instructions since it works like every other printer in the civilized world. You hit print, your sheet prints. Done.

The sheer simplicity of the Cambridge setup suits my style. Though I print rarely, I will probably continue to recommend the Cambridge lab to public computer seekers for this reason alone.

I will likely drop in soon on the Somerville Public Library. I jog past it quite a bit and have occasionally dropped a book off for the return bin in the course of a run. I've noted on these runs that this library keeps the same hours as the main libraries in Boston and Cambridge, implying (to me) that it must have a decent public computer setup. Only one way to find out...

August brought the Olympics and with it some good old fashioned sitting in front of the TV. The Olympics generally leaves me confused with all the inconsistency in competition formats, event selection, amateur status, and so on. This time around was no exception. How, exactly, does the pentathlon have only four events? I did not notice The Pentagon undergoing construction to become The Quadrilateral while I was in DC. Surely, we can at least ensure the name describes the event?

I was surprised to learn that the Olympic triathlon featured only ('only') a six point two mile run. I always thought it was a full marathon (confusing it with the 'ironman' concept, I guess). The bike race is 25 miles. I tend to run about six miles or so five or six times a week and generally bike between eight and fifteen miles. So, almost by accident, I'm about halfway through one of these things a few times a week.

I could go on all day about the Olympics. It is truly a strange event. Maybe in four years I'll consider writing in-depth about it.

Anything else? Surely, there is nothing else...

Traveling this summer was a great time. Seeing old friends, exploring new places, eating fried rubbish, so on and so forth. Would not trade it for anything. On the other hand, I was reminded of a few things I had forgotten during my short sabbatical from taking out of town trips.

One was how I used to realize that it was silly to seek out the types of things to do in other towns that I never do in Boston. This includes actual activities (like going to museums) or doing basic preparation/research for actual activities (like finding out which museums locals consider excellent). I'm better at remembering to this now but I still suspect there is room for improvement.

Another came in reflecting on what I enjoyed the most while travelling this summer. The most rewarding parts of my experiences were seeing friends, making use of quiet (or obligation-free) time to reflect, and getting away from some of my less joyful defaults. The reality for me is that these are things I can do each day at home if I gave some proper effort to organizing my time in order to allow it.

I'm greatly looking forward to my next trip away. I have never regretted the time and money spent seeing friends. But it would be a silly mistake to not incorporate as much of what I enjoyed from my summer trips into my day to day existence in the coming fall. Getting the best out of Boston while I'm still around requires the same preparation I put into getting the best out of time away from Boston. Building pockets of stillness into the day and re-evaluating the things I currently do on autopilot do not necessarily require a train ticket to the Big Apple. If you can do it there, you can do it anywhere.

Thanks again for reading. We will be back on Wednesday with a new type of post- I am going to showcase a series of photographs I took of various plates of French fries I ate over the past two months.

Until then,

Tim

Footnotes / potential complaints

1. My 'starting up' daily checklist

Hi all. So this is what I have at the top of my own organizer (to do list). I took line one from a book about Bill Parcells- I believe Al Davis told this to him when he was complaining about all the injuries and problems he was having while coaching the New York Giants.

The next block in section one is from A Hundred White Daffodils by Jane Kenyon. Tenets to live by if you want to live in a particular way, I suppose.

Section 1b was covered last week.

Section 1c is for my habit of trying to memorize song lyrics. For some reason, I've been going through Youtube and finding different performances of 'Auld Lang Syne' (it's the song you always here on New Year's Eve). Since I never knew what the words were, I figure out I would look them up.

I ran into an old acquaintance on the train just last week who mentioned that he always considered Labor Day to be like New Year's Eve. The summer ending and all that. I thought that was a funny coincidence. Maybe next year I'll throw a party on that Sunday night.

'Ne Me Quitte Pas' is probably the next one I'll tackle once I have 'Auld Lang Syne' down.

Starting up…
1a. daily reminders...

--> No one cares- coach your team

*Be a good steward to your gifts
*Protect your time
*Feed your inner life
*Avoid too much noise
*Read good books
*Have good sentences in your ears
*Be by yourself as often as you can
*Walk
*Take the phone off the hook
*Work regular hours

1b. The top five regrets of hospice patients?...YOU ALREADY REGRET THESE THINGS.
--> The moment you lose your health, you lose the ability to follow your dreams
--> Cut out everything you can leave behind so you are not income dependent
--> Learn to express your feelings
--> Stay in touch with friends and reach back out to those who reach out to you
--> Pretending to be someone else defines your happiness on someone else’s terms

1c…(ne me quitte pas)

Auld Lang Syne

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and auld lang syne?

   CHORUS:  
For auld lang syne, my jo,  
for auld lang syne,  
we'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet,  
for auld lang syne.

finding meaning in work

Hi folks,

Hope everyone enjoyed a relaxing Labor Day. According to Google, the holiday is held in honor of working people. It is also the (unofficial) end of summer, book-ending the season that (unofficially) started on Memorial Day.

Of course, seasons don't really start or end. It is hard to tell sometimes when things start or end. It is symbolic more than anything to say that a particular season starts or ends. To label a portion of time 'summer' or 'winter' lends a semblance of meaning to a particular time of year.

Labor Day honoring 'working people' brings the meaning of 'working people' into question. I'm not working today. Probably not doing so tomorrow, either. I wonder if I should have taken yesterday off. Off from what, right?

The holiday was not always about working people or a final weekend trip to idle in line while waiting to get into a parking lot by an overcrowded beach with your family or friends. It started as a way to honor the American labor movement. The symbolic meaning of the day has changed quite a bit over time.

Perhaps it would have been disrespectful to the memory of those in the labor movement to not take yesterday off. Symbolic gestures are hard to understand, occasionally.

I think a working person is someone whose thoughts and actions contribute to society. I suppose this celebrates almost everyone. I like that it includes groups often left out of the 'working people' category- full time caretakers, authors of pointless blogs, parents, so on.

Meanings change over time, I guess. I never knew that Labor Day started to honor the labor movement. I assumed it was for working people in the present day. I suppose taking the day off is one way to honor those who sacrificed in the process of contributing to the well-being of this country.

One way meanings change is because symbols change. Labor Day was a day off because one hundred years ago days off were much rarer than they are today. It was symbolic to have a day off to celebrate an achievement. It was symbolic to have a day off to honor the memory of those lost. Those things are not so symbolic today thanks to such innovations as paid time off and bereavement leave.

The achievements of trade unions at the time were significant. They were more than sufficient to merit a symbolic day of celebration. Maybe it was a symbolic day to honor those killed during the Pullman Strike or perhaps the many more who suffered as they contributed to our railroads. History is a little hazy on those details.

Another way meanings change is when someone points out something, particularly if it is true. Someone pointed out once that the cost of replacing all the work a full-time parent does through nannies, cooks, cleaners, chauffeurs, laundry services, and so on, all summed up, would equal quite the annual salary. Nearly $120k, according to salary.com's 14th annual Mom Salary Survey. That is a lot of money.

Long ago, I'm sure full time parents much more readily accepted the notion that they were not 'working people'. That's how society was, I'm told. Things have changed over time. The meaning of work has changed over time. 

Sometimes the job itself provides meaning. Other times, an industry or organization is obviously meaningful. In certain cases, the employees have to find meaning for themselves. But the meaning is rarely fixed. Whatever the meaning now, it is always subject to change later.

I wonder what meaning the railroad union workers took from work. Was it the opportunity to build something that stitched a diverse nation together, to contribute to a nationwide project that linked east and west, that brought the liberty of movement to each and all, one tie at a time? Perhaps they felt obliged to continue the work of those who came before them, to ensure the work and sacrifices and suffering of many did not happen in vain.

Even vain people seek meaning. That is not always true, of course, but it does seems to be one of the universal human truths- people ultimately seek meaning. What is the meaning of life, what is the meaning of this song, what is the meaning of baseball, what is the meaning of that thing you just said, and all that and so forth.

It's always been true for me. Sometimes, I seek meaning here.

I used to play sports all the time. Back then, it meant something. I was in a new country with a different flag. I could fit in if I knew where the foul line or third base or the fifty-yard line was. I bet a lot of athletes started with a similar experience- finding meaning in a game because it meant they belonged somewhere.

I remember very few things from that time. Sports, obviously. The flag, I suppose. We stood in front of it every day and pledged allegiance and sang songs about it in second-grade music class. You're a grand old flag and all that.

A flag is symbolic. I like our flag. It looks cool because it is so different from most other flags- stars and stripes.

When we add states, the stars are adjusted. To me, this represents the best part of America. It has a unique capacity to grow and to change and to accept new things and ideas and people.

I never learned in school that it was symbolic gesture to sit down in front of the flag while everyone else is standing up.

A flag is symbolic. I do not like our flag. It looks ridiculous because it is so different from most other flags- stars and stripes.

When we add states, the stripes remain fixed. To me, this represents the worst part of America- its capacity to cling to the past and to outdated ideas and to worry about exactly where certain colors are supposed to go.

A symbolic thing has meaning.  But the same symbol can have different meanings to different people. I imagine there are plenty of people like me who are conflicted by the contradictions presented by the symbols in their life.

Back when I used to play sports all day, I used to watch sports all day. I watched football. It was just another way to fit in and because of that it held great meaning. I developed knowledge, a know-how, about games and teams and leagues superior to many of my peers.

Conflicted feelings are nothing new to a football fan. We often wonder aloud what will happen to the NFL when somebody dies during a game. The collisions on each play are significant and the lifelong damage to many former players is well documented. A nationally televised death seems inevitable. Until then, we continue watching.

My know-how about football used to mean a great deal to me. It took a long time to accumulate that know-how. It made me irreplaceable in a particular way because no one else could replicate my knowledge.

The search for meaning is nothing new to a football fan. We often wonder aloud what team names actually mean. Do the Washington Redskins honor Native Americans? Do the San Francisco 49ers honor the Chinese immigrants who were systematically discriminated against throughout the gold rush?

My know-how about football is less relevant now. It does not have the same meaning anymore. And smartphones make my recall of facts and figures nearly redundant.

One player whose career I've followed with great interest is Colin Kaepernick. When he joined the NFL, the most notable element of his play was his speed. He could run faster than anyone. I noticed right away how he ran with the near-perfect technique that I have come to admire in my post-college years.

I wonder what football meant to Kaepernick when he was a little kid. Did he want to fit in like me? I've heard that he wanted to play for the San Francisco 49ers, just like he does now.

In August, Kaepernick sat down during the national anthem prior to his team's preseason game. This is currently a big story among football fans. It has become a big story, period. Even Donald Trump is weighing in! And it is only preseason.

I wonder if Kaepernick grew up in a place where education meant accumulating know-how. From my experience, so much focus in childhood was put on developing know-how in math, in science, in history. Especially history, the subject of facts and figures.

Everyone studied the labor disputes. People were killed. We learned when and where. Sometimes we knew the names of the leadership. We knew how. The point was know-how. Rare was the discussion about how people on both sides of this dispute must have felt.

I wonder if Kaepernick learned in school that it is a symbolic gesture to sit down in front of the flag while everyone else is standing up.

There are discussions about this all over the country. People know when and where Kaepernick sat. People know how he sat. The point of the discussion is know-how; what is the appropriate way to protest? The reaction is to the method more so than the message. And rare is the conversation that aims to connect how both sides are feeling.

A symbolic thing has many different meanings to many different people. A flag is symbolic.

To many, the flag represents the best that their loved ones sacrificed for the well-being of the country. To reject the flag is to dismiss the suffering that comes with losing a loved one.

To many others, the flag represents the worst that has been done to their loved ones by the country. To accept the flag is to dismiss the suffering that comes with losing a loved one.

Understanding feelings is really no help at all in addressing know-how questions. You can't get an A on that assignment. It will not help on the SAT. Maybe that is why schools focus on other things.

The response to Kaepernick has focused primarily on what little know-how can be gleaned from the situation. How should one protest? What is the way to state a message? Who is offended by the method?

Even President Obama is weighing in: '(Kaepernick) cares about some very serious issues that need to be talked about.' The president is acknowledging a right to protest.

A Forbes magazine headline also acknowledges this right while summarizing the focus on the know-how: 'Kaepernick has a right to protest but his execution needs work.'

Kaepernick, after his initial act was noted by the media: 'I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color.'

When people talk about 'what side of the fence' they are on in terms of Kaepernick's protest, they are talking about his know-how, his execution of a symbolic gesture. I can't find anyone saying he should stop what he is doing because his original intent is false.

The strongest thing you can say against any statement is that it is false. I can't find that statement anywhere from anyone. No one has said, 'This country does not oppress people of color.'

When the Pullman Strike happened, President Cleveland ordered in the Army. I don't have any direct quotes. But it does seem like the president did not bother to acknowledge a right to protest. I don't think Forbes magazine was in print.

No one has said, 'This country does not oppress people', for that matter. Oppression is not always active. I feel withholding any and all support needed by a combat veteran returning home is a form of oppression. Perhaps the public money is needed to fund football stadiums.

Comparing what happened in Pullman with Kaepernick's protest, even partially, is a bit of a stretch. I could see it being read as such. Many died at Pullman. Nobody dies in a football game (unless by unpreventable accident, of course). The danger in trying to create anything new is the near-guarantee that the creator has no control over how it is interpreted.

The stakes of the jobs are so different. If a quarterback fails, he is told to refine his delivery. I don't know what a railroad worker is told when he fails. A long time ago, most of them did not even speak English.

One way to ensure that your creation is not misread is to always refine your delivery, to always find ways to work on your craft, to always work on how you present your message. In this way, over time even the point of the most poorly delivered initial message might come through in the next iteration. But you always have to know the point you are trying to get across.

Kaepernick is used to being told to 'refine his delivery'. That is football scouting lingo for someone whose throwing mechanics need improvement. He never had the best mechanics. Like I said, I've followed his career closely.

Meaning changes over time. For many athletes, I imagine the meaning of playing a sport changes as they transition from wide-eyed kid to professional player.

Last week, Kaepernick took a knee during the national anthem. Other athletes have since joined him, within and outside football.

I suppose it is possible that a professional athlete may find no meaning at all from the sport they play. It becomes a job. A lot of people take no meaning from their work. They look elsewhere for meaning.

Megan Rapinoe on kneeling prior to her team's game last week to show her support for Kaepernick: 'Being a gay American, I know what it means to look at the flag and not have it protect all of your liberties.' Up until then, she had always stood before the flag, including at this summer's Olympics.

I read an article about Kaepernick early this summer, far before any national anthems were played. A teammate quoted in the article thought Kaepernick was looser, more himself. I've always thought people who felt free to be who they are at work got a lot more accomplished.

I wonder if one reason so many find work lacking in meaning is the great emphasis on know-how. The more a job requires know-how, the more replaceable one feels. Work becomes a list of objectives that anyone can fulfill and you just happen to be the person doing it now. You are required to contort yourself so you fit into the definition for a role. The next automation tool, the next wave of outsourcing, the next economic crunch, the next young kid coming out of school, any of those might make you and your knowledge redundant.

A workplace where you can fully be yourself is sometimes one of great meaning. It brings out the best in you. It brings out what is only in you.

In a place like that, you can bide your time while you seek out the true meaning of your life. Instead of joining a rat-race to accumulate know-how, your challenge is to find ways to best apply your unique strengths to the problems at hand.

A friend of mine has a theory. People want their strengths to be unique to them and their weaknesses to be shared with others. Or something like that. The theory is in its early days. But I like it.

49er teammate Eric Reid knelt last week. He intends to continue showing his support for Kaepernick throughout the season: 'These issues are much bigger than the game of football. . . . We love this country so much that we want it to be better.' He went on to cite the treatment of military veterans as one of the areas this country needs to improve in, that we need to change.

One way to make work more meaningful is to make it less about know-how and more about emphasizing each person's individual capacity to contribute. If who you are is important, then you are less replaceable in a workplace that relies on it. Everyone's strengths start to become unique.

Homeless veterans ask passerby around them for change all the time. I think people try to give them a quarter back, if they can, but nickels and dimes are more prevalent.

People always seek meaning. If it is not found in work, they look elsewhere. On the other hand, when people do find meaning, sometimes they come back to work with that knowledge. They infuse meaning into what others insist is meaningless. They try to make it their life's work because they have no other choice. What you do all day is what you do your whole life. They simply must do it.

A working person is someone who contributes to society. I've always thought that many people make their biggest contribution to society through parenting. And I've heard parents find their work very meaningful. I'm not surprised. A parent is literally irreplaceable. They bring out the best of what is in them, and only them, each day.

Football fans have always regarded preseason games as meaningless. The things that happen in preseason are generally disregarded.

A quick note in case you were thinking of applying for a parenting position- parents don't really get days off. They don't actually get all that money I cited earlier. I'm not sure if they relaxed yesterday or not.

On the other hand, there are no meaningless days because it all adds up. I'm a little hazy on the details, obviously.

It is always fascinating to watch someone search for meaning. It is messy at first. You have no idea what they are trying to do or say. It is like crawling, it is crawling. At some point, coherence or structure may emerge, or not.

Progress is small, at first, in a search for meaning. Baby steps. Good support, such as a place where you can be yourself, is very helpful at this stage. You wander and you wonder safely.

Over time, everything starts to add up. The big idea starts to emerge. You start to infuse the things around you with bits and pieces of yourself.

You can't help it if you believe in it. Your growth challenges the fixed boundaries around you.

Sometimes, you are accommodated. The stars are rearranged every time we add a state.

Sometimes, you aren't. The stripes always line up the same way.

Symbolic things work that way- it is either/or and not necessarily consistent. That's why people seek meaning, not symbols. Meaning lasts much longer.

This country has always found ways to honor contributions through symbols.

Labor Day is one such symbol. But Labor Day didn't always exist. It came into being because someone found meaning. Others then found a symbolic place for it.

The flag is one such symbol. It came into being because someone found meaning in certain ideals. No one rejects these ideals today, the ones that I remember in the ending to the Pledge of Allegiance- 'for liberty and justice to all'.

And yet, it does seem like we are losing track of these ideals. If important ideals are being lost, someone needs to point it out. Otherwise, we risk moving further away from achieving liberty and justice to all.

It is OK to disagree with an idea. It is OK to disagree with a symbolic representation of an idea. Having good intentions does not excuse offending or hurting others. Sometimes, what we say, write, or do as we seek meaning wounds others despite our best intentions to do differently. All we can do in these cases is to resolve to do better next time. All we can do is refine our approach.

We have to believe in our own capacity to change and to grow as we seek the meaning in what we do. We have to do the same with others. We have to understand the ideals to aim for in the process of becoming the best country that we can be and we must never settle by describing what falls short as 'good enough' or as 'representing progress'.

I think something similar is at play when we seek meaning in work. To find the work that means most to us, we must know what our ideals are and resolve to do better when we fall short. It is OK to consider external factors so long as we can keep these ideals in mind. It takes time to figure it all out. 

A belief in our own capacity to change and to grow as we seek this answer is critical. The temptation to dismiss this challenge by labeling what we do all day as 'just a job' is significant. Standing up to this temptation is easier if we are constantly seeking to do better but making something easier does not make it easy.

Over a century has passed since a group of people found meaning in their work by starting a movement to better themselves and the community around them. Their movement led to a holiday in its honor. It is our great fortune to live in a place where we can find meaning in work without having to risk so much in return.

The challenge to honor the sacrifices of those who have passed is a massive one. We owe so much to so many that sometimes we do almost the opposite. The least we can do to commemorate Labor Day is to continue to seek meaning in what we do each day, whether at work or elsewhere, and maintain the spirit of contribution to self and community that liberty demands of us.

Many thanks to those patiently waiting for this post. Back on Friday (probably) at the usual time.

Tim

to no one's surprise...delayed...

Hi all,

Let's say this post goes up at 2pm EST today.

Tim

today's post is cancelled...

Sorry...

It is Labor Day, after all. A day to relax and not worry at all about work. And I know reading my posts is sometimes hard work...

I do expect to have something up tomorrow. Between 11am and noon, as usual. Please come back then.

Have a nice Labor Day.

Tim